Step's audio Reviews on Newgrounds

[404]

This is an NGADM Round 3 Review.

--

Talk about making a 180-degree turn from what you've made so far. I'm thrilled to hear that camoshark actually contributed more to this submission, and it shows clearly in the total shift in style. Above all, however, the sheer ambition of this track is already something to admire. Not only do you have fantastic guitar and drum playing by Kor-Rune and Patrick, but you have the detail, intricacy and complexity in your composition that gives this a noticeable edge over other submissions, at least in the melodic and harmonic department. So yeah, sounding like you're composing on crack makes for some impressive stuff!

You've got some absolutely brilliant compositional aspects here. For starters, the rhodes organ was a highly enjoyable addition. Not only did it fit into the track so well but provided some awesome harmonies to back up the melodies, especially with that really gripping and catchy chord passage that starts twelve seconds into the piece. I also absolutely love the drum work. The rhythms fit perfectly and the drum beats are incredibly intricate. The little fills/solos like the one at 0:09 or the one at 2:25 are brilliant. Huge props to Patrick for delivering such a glorious showcase of his raw talent.

I always feel compelled to talk about transitions in a review of a track which Skye was involved in, given his reputation of being so meticulous with them. I think the transitions here are wonderfully smooth, with highlights being 1:14's awesome sustaned chord into the drum solo, or 0:50's introduction of the main motif. The smooth transitions complement the pace of this track very well. You've actually got a surprisingly intense pace with a lot going on, both harmonically and melodically, and having every section meld so well with the next gave this a very gripping and uninterrupted listening experience.

The two main pillars of music creation - composition and production - are certainly done very well here, but each have their own little issues. I'll start with the compositional issues. First off, while you have some great stuff, I felt like the melodies were a bit directionless, as if they were talking a lot but not really saying anything. This is especially true in 1:21's needlessly long section which doesn't do anything particularly profound and ends up coming off as repetitive and bland. I also feel like the ending could've been executed more properly. The track unnaturally and abruptly bursts in volume at the end, and the cymbal isn't even given enough time to fully ring before the track ends. In terms of production, while, again, you have some great stuff, it could have been tighter. The bass in particular is very undefined. Lastly, I feel like corners were cut with the second iteration of your motif at 2:39, which is essentially a direct copy-paste of its original counterpart, whereas, especially in a genre like jazz, I was hoping for something more unexpected.

While I can tell where the corners were cut, this is still a fantastic and intricate jazz piece that I thoroughly enjoyed listening to. Bravo!

SCORE: 9/10

camoshark responds:

Heyo Step, thanks for popping in!

"[Intro paragraph]"

<3

"For starters, the rhodes organ was a highly enjoyable addition"

Lol, throughout the entire compositional process, that part was played by a grand piano, which gave it a much more vanilla jazz feel (especially with the bass being an upright too). That was all Skye's doing, and I'll agree it's a great match, even though it's theoretically neither a Rhodes nor an organ! (nice try though) :P

"[Much love for the drums]"

Heh, while we DID write down a few sketches for what we wanted the drums to sound like, this was all Patrick's doing. That's one of the reasons why I systematically choose him whenever I need to record some drums: we've got the same ideas and mindsets. So I just give him vague cues like " give this bit a standard 8-feel, this bit a square 4-beat, a two-bar transitional fill to go towards something more hard-rock-ish, and then go crazy" and he shits out gold nuggets every time.

"First off, while you have some great stuff, I felt like the melodies were a bit directionless, as if they were talking a lot but not really saying anything."

Yeah, we get that a lot. I can't really figure a good way to remedy that though, because Skye and I tend to work more in styles that use "horizontal" composition, which relies more on movement and ideas, rather than broad melodic phrase and recurring themes.

I guess we'll try to make our themes more to-the-point and have more in common.

"This is especially true in 1:21's needlessly long section which doesn't do anything particularly profound and ends up coming off as repetitive and bland."

Gah, I'll agree you got me there. We were actually supposed to integrate more stuff in there, including a guitar and bass solo, but time is a bitch, and we ended needing to ax it out to finish the song.

Can't really say much more than sorry, we'll try to not keep useless space like that in the final version if we get to it.

" I also feel like the ending could've been executed more properly. The track unnaturally and abruptly bursts in volume at the end, and the cymbal isn't even given enough time to fully ring before the track ends."

That, my friend, is the sound of "HOLY SHIT WE'RE AN HOUR AWAY FROM THE DEADLINE AND DON'T HAVE AN ENDING TO THIS, LOOP DAT SHIZ AND BUT A BOW IN IT!!1! DDD:" I'd say it's a miracle it even managed to fit with the rest, but it's definitely far from good.

Also whoops on the cymbal resonance...

" Lastly, I feel like corners were cut with the second iteration of your motif at 2:39, which is essentially a direct copy-paste of its original counterpart, whereas, especially in a genre like jazz, I was hoping for something more unexpected."

That is literally what it is. Sorry. :C It was either that or some random meandering that had nothing to do with the rest of the song, so I figured blatant copy-paste would at the very least give a semblance of closure.

Thanks for the review Step, t'was much appreciated. I'm really glad you enjoyed nonetheless!

Toodles

[Hope]

This is an NGADM Round 3 Review.

--

First things first - sorry for your loss! It was bad timing to have this tragic event happen when halfway through the contest but somehow you pulled through and made him a great tribute indeed. This has the usual fantastic aspects that I've come to expect from you, having listened to more of your tracks than I have fingers. The production is meticulously and masterfully executed, the guitar playing is phenomenal, and, of course, it has the beefiest and meatiest snare I've ever heard in a metal track on Newgrounds.

One thing I particularly liked over here would be some of the absolutely incredible lead guitar sections you've thrown in. You have this style of playing that I think you've been incorporating more heavily into your more recent music. It's a tendency to make these very upfront, soaring, high melodies played by the lead guitar. Parts like 1:03 and 2:35 really make this style shine, and it's an absolute pleasure to listen to, especially when paired with your beefy mix, suitable rhythm guitar accompaniment and powerful drum work. It's a listening experience you can't achieve nearly as well in any other genre, and you represent it fantastically.

There are a bunch of other sections here that I think you did a great job with. The mastery with which you play the solo at 1:41 is no less than awe-inspiring. I also love the transition at 3:02. The momentary pause was a great idea, but what sold it was how you brought in the intense pace once more. You also have a solid transition at 1:26, followed by a section that plays familiar material, which was a nice touch. You also once again nailed the intro, which is in the same vein as your previous track's intro, what with the filter you put on it.

The reason why I don't think this is quite as good as the near-masterpiece you gave us in Round 2 is that I feel like it sounds a bit less inspired. Perhaps it was time constraints or simply lack of inspiration, but I feel like the melodies weren't very interesting, save for perhaps 2:35. Sections like 2:04 or so feel less like meaningful continuations to the track and more like filler to showcase some new riff or rhythm. The ending also isn't particularly satisfying or suiting. Couple that with your brickwall mastering which eats up a lot of the dynamic range and you've got a listening experience that sounds quite samey and flat throughout. You got away with it mostly in your previous track with really fantastic sections and solid, exciting foreground melodies, and while you still retain some of that stuff here, it's been taken a notch down from what you've shown you're capable of.

And that's all I have to say about it. You did a phenomenal job with this track! Great work.

SCORE: 9.1/10

PirateCrab responds:

Really didn't expect to get as high a score in this round but I certainly didn't expect to get through due to how rough those two weeks where for me!

Firstly again, thanks for pointing out the bits you liked. I'll 100% be incorporating them into my next track, but only with more power and more emotional content!

In my defence, I worked on this piece for 2 days. When my friend passed, I spiralled for a good week. Unable to work, write, play or generally do anything. Once the shock had worn off, I was extremely time limited with regards to what I could do and pull out of the bag.

I already have some new ideas I've NEVER incorporated in my tracks before. Stuff that's gonna bring a whole new bag to the table. All I'm gonna say is just you wait ;)

[redemption]

This is an NGADM Round 3 Review.

--

You know, I think this might be my favourite contest submission from you this year. Maybe it's because you spent three days on it instead of two. I can't even begin to imagine how good your submission would be if you spent TWO WEEKS on it, but I don't think that's ever going to happen! Rambling aside, what you've given us here is a jumble of your best styles - the emotion and melodic prowess of "footsteps" and the uplifting sound of "wide world" and "i believe". Let me say that it really, really worked. Seven minutes of wonderful music that doesn't ever get boring for a second is nothing to scoff at.

I'll get the production out of the way to get the ball rolling. Your production is actually pretty great this time! I can tell you spent more time on the mixing or at least everything fell into place more easily this time round. Well, I can imagine something more stripped-down like this to be much easier to mix than the more climactic and explosive natures of your previous tracks, but regardless, I proudly have little to no complaints about the mix this time. I actually think that the drums fit wonderfully here because they give this track a very unique sense of forward motion without sounding too exciting, but in fact, what really sold it for me is their sound and the way you mixed them in. You nailed the levelling.

The composition is absolutely fantastic. You make use of major 7ths a lot. I think the major 7th is a very tricky note to use since it's easy for it to have an unpleasant, dissonant sound, but if you know what you're doing when you use it, it really heightens the emotional value of a melody. You use it very well here. But really, this is honestly jam-packed with so many beautiful melodies that I don't know where to start. To help break up the song's structure further, you even include that vocal section from the talented etherealwinds, which actually sounds pretty fantastic. I'd say this track is the epitome of what happens when a good sense of composition and bucketloads of creativity collide.

I have a bunch of small, and mostly stylistic gripes, since I don't think anything particularly stands out as an obvious flaw. Some transitions didn't do it for me. 0:46 sounds pretty premature and abrupt, and I feel like a more gradual and careful approach to that section would give it more meaning when it finally comes in. At around 5:45 where a bunch of elements in the track start fading out... yeah that didn't sit well with me either. It almost sounds like you had those two sections separated, and during the process of arranging the track together, you couldn't think of a good way to tie those two sections together. 0:46's synth is also a bit too loud I think (only mixing complaint I have). Lastly, the ending. It's not bad at all! However, I somehow feel like it could be a bit more subtle. I don't know... the tonic chord at the end sounds a little forced to me. You approached the ending so well, but when that final note played, I just didn't feel it. I hate giving criticism like this since it's so vague and unhelpful, but it's still a good ending and it's not worth worrying about.

This is just a beautiful track that would have given Zip and Steam a run for their money, that's for sure. Astounding work! On a final note, I know that one of these days you will make an ending - a gloriously satisfying ending - and I will love it. I KNOW YOU CAN DO IT.

SCORE: 9.5/10

johnfn responds:

> how good your submission would be if you spent TWO WEEKS

Oh shush you ;-) The maximum number of days I could even work on a song for NGADM would be 4, because there are only 2 weekends in the 2 week timespan. I'm pretty tired after work, and it's led to some really frustrating and unproductive nights heh.

> major 7ths

I don't even know what that is. How do you even music theory? *google* Oh... right. I know what that is. But I didn't think I was using them that often heh. I do really enjoy them though, they have a great open feel to them.

> 5:45 where a bunch of elements in the track start fading out

Heh yeah I tossed that on last minute. I actually meant for everything to become more reverbed rather than quieter, which I enjoy, but I just messed up the leveling :p

> tonic chord

Yeah I can see that. Next time, THE PICARDY THIRD! Oh wait, I was pretending I didn't know music theory before? Oops.

> an ending - a gloriously satisfying ending

I think I ended Footsteps pretty well. Yep, one good ending in 2 NGADMs so far. You have to take what you can get ;-)

Anyway, I'm glad you liked my track, but it didn't really come as a surprise because if I like my track then I know you're going to like it too. We have the same mind after all O_O

Of course it's also kinda lame because when I know my track is crap, I know you're going to call me out on it :p

But I mean whatever. It's still pretty sweet to have a telepathic link with one of the judges.

IM GETTING SIDETRACKED ANYWAYS thanks for the great review. I am always highly appreciative.

[There]

This is an NGADM Round 3 Review.

--

Oh wow. To me, your music is a PRIME example of what I personally look for in the electronic genre. Flawless production value and sound manipulation, but on top of that, super creative ideas and original concepts. You've got the habit of making each of your tracks so memorable, whether through catchy melodic hooks like in your Round 1 track, through unique instrument/synth choices like in your Round 2 track or through crazy sound manipulation and glitching like in this one. And let me tell you; this is a very, very good habit to have.

I think what I love the most about this would definitely be your sound design. Your synths are extraordinarily good, and there's a huge variety of them too! You treat us with a lot of new sounds throughout the length of the track. Even at the end, where most artists would lazily keep using the sounds and patterns they used before, you treat us with this awesome bass section at 3:43! Honestly, there are so many awesome synth patterns here, like the 0:33 arpeggios or the 1:06 lead sound that you layer on top of everything else. Another pretty small thing I quite liked was the reverb tail at 2:31. Perfect way to end that section.

You know, I keep praising you for your unique ideas and sound design, but your composition is actually pretty damn solid too! You have some awesome chord choices and make use of motifs really well to tie the track together rather than have it a directionless showcase of awesome sound design (which, I think, is a tempting route for a lot of electronic music). Plus, The vocals, unlike in Acidulus 8, are perfect here. I assume that's you singing, but whatever the case they sound really professional and funnily enough, give me these strong 80s vibes which actually work hilariously well.

I'm not the first to mention it, but some of the glitching didn't do it for me. I mean, it sounds badass at some parts. For instance, the glitching at the start and at the end, while taking a while to get used to, kind of grew on me and now I feel like the intro and outro shouldn't be done any other way, but 0:50 (and to a lesser extent 1:53)... still can't understand it! It SOUNDS pretty insane and memorable, but it really destroys the whole buildup you had going and ate up all the tension that rose through that buildup, making the more dance-like, busy section that comes right after sound much less satisfying.

Apart from that little quirk, which may even be personal opinion, I absolutely love this. You are so ridiculously good at what you do, and I look forward to your submission each round. While your Round 1 submission is still my favourite (purely because of how addicted I am to that melody you made), this comes at close second. Absolutely PHENOMENAL work.

SCORE: 9.6/10

garlagan responds:

Gosh your reviews Step, they're golden!
SO glad you liked the track! Wasn't sure at all about it. And actually you mentioned one of the things I wasn't convinced of either; which is the last seconds of the buildup. I got used to it though and thought it kind of worked. It was the effect of wanting to stay away from the typical sweep up tension cliché thing and what not.
You're right about the 80s vibes! It may be because of its disco feel or some vocal notes, not sure.
Anyway, THANK.YOU.STEP.

[A Night in the Attic]

This is an NGADM Round 2 Review.

--

This is one of the most unexpected tracks of this round. Not only is it in a genre and style that isn't explored very often on Newgrounds, but it's by a person who very rarely makes this kind of music. I for one love this approach, and your execution of it is surprisingly adept. There are some immensely nice touches to this piece, such as your use of sound effects, your extremely fitting humming, the slight but very present ritardando that plays during every loud glockenspiel note (such as at 1:09), and the section around 4 minutes in where it turns into a more peaceful and cheery vibe, while still retaining the subtlety of the previous sections. In a track which takes a more simple route, it's touches like these that really become all the more appreciated.

Now to get down to the meat of the track - the composition. You've done it again - I absolutely love your chord progressions played eerily by the piano, and your control of motifs is once again unmatched. Your transitions are wonderfully solid, which makes for a very atmospheric listening experience with an uninterrupted flow. One of my favourite things about this would be how you used the instruments you had at your disposal. It's no secret your samples aren't the best, but this time round I actually think you used them very well. You were able to overcome the barrier of sample quality to the point that I don't even thing better samples would greatly improve this track. It sounds great as it is.

Like others have mentioned, your production is certainly improving. Your voice sounds more full-bodied, and overall the mix sounds more balanced. I think some sounds stand out a bit too much, such as the glockenspiel in particular. It feels too upfront at times fix this, and somewhat dry too. I would add more reverb to it, EQ out some of its highs and turn it down just a notch. My main issue with this is that I feel like there was a lot of room for you to diverge and really have a lot of fun with what you've got. While I do enjoy the subtlety in this track, there was room to add more warped effects and eerie sounds that add to the chilling atmosphere, and more room to add distinctive sections and new melodic ideas. For a piece that runs for nearly six minutes, while you did a good job in its execution, it feels limited in what it offers.

Either way, this is definitely one of the more memorable pieces this round. I loved your approach and I think you did a great job with this!

SCORE: 8.7/10

Troisnyx responds:

It wasn't memorable enough to everyone on the panel bar Neon-Bard, from what the scores tell me. Helpful as the review is, I cannot help but feel absolutely deceived. One year on, the sentiment still hasn't quite changed...

[Aurora Dawn]

This is an NGADM Round 2 Review.

--

Oh damn that voice. I've listened to well over half of your music library, and I still spend most of it searching for my jaw. Your voice just gets me every time. I mention it for this piece in particular because I want to stress how good the vocal performance is here - one of my favourites from you. It's not over-the-top with complex vocal techniques but has just enough to impress, and the vocal harmonies/echoes at the end are simply to die for. And wow, from English to Danish to Greek to Chinese and now Esperanto. Don't forget to hit me and Echo up whenever you want to sing in Maltese! But yeah, fantastic job in the vocal department. I feel like vocals can easily give a musician an edge since voice is inarguably the most expressive instrument, and when you sing this well you really can't go wrong.

I'm not just here to gush over your vocals though. If there's one area you excel at more than you do at singing, it's building an atmosphere through strong compositional elements. For instance, after a fairly run-of-the-mill string intro, you instantly pull the listener into your deep atmosphere with the bassy piano notes. Your heavy amount of reverb makes this a track you can easily space out to, but instead of taking the tempting route of washing everything out with reverberation you keep the track firmly rooted in your spectacular composition with absolutely beautiful passages like 2:02's string run, 2:24's melodic piano passage or your piano outro. Major props for adding in such a suitable key change at the end too! Love it.

Honestly, the only reason I deducted 0.6 from what would otherwise be a perfect score is your mixing. It's not that it's particularly bad, but I have a complaint that I remember having on the first piece of yours I ever reviewed; Blind Maiden. There's too much focus on the vocals. There are some nice instrumental passages, but when the voice comes in it's too loud and drowns out a lot of the other instruments. I also feel like the instrument section could do with more mid and low frequencies, especially from 1:27 onwards. You'll have to strip down some of the frequencies from your voice first of course, or else it'll sound muddy as hell, but basically what I'm asking for is more balance in your mix, where the depth comes from the instruments rather than your voice, but where your voice is still clear.

Mixing quirk aside, this is really good stuff, as I've come to expect every single time from you. 9.4/10 would lose jaw to again.

SCORE: 9.4/10

etherealwinds responds:

Thank you for the in depth review!
I actually spent a lot of time trying to separate all of the frequencies so that they didn't clash. Also, for the first time, I added a separate volume gate envelope and manually adjusted the volume throughout the vocals at different parts to try and keep the vocals from overpowering the instruments. ^ ^

I remember when it was first pointed out how loud the vocals were in Blind Maiden last year compared to the rest of the instruments and how before that, I had never noticed. To my ears at least in this, the balance in volume sounds okay. The gain of the vocals in Blind Maiden was probably about +6.5db higher than the vocals in this in comparison to the instrumental. I'm afraid I don't hear the vocals as being overwhelming. ;_;

Thank you for your kind words Step!! I always appreciate your honest critique and really, it's invaluable.

[The Valley of Apples and Hope]

Heya! For starters... man, the Ōkami vibes I'm getting from this make me miss that game so much. Right from the start I knew my review would instantly be biased positively, since I love that game's art direction, from its graphics to its soundtrack, and I'm getting strong vibes of that style over here. I don't know if it was an intentional nod to the style or not, but whatever the case, you really do it justice. Either way, biased or not, I think this is a very solid and well-developed piece.

I'm going to get the bad stuff out of the way first, and I'm starting with the glaringly obvious. The samples are bad quality. You can't go very far with soundfonts. Naturally I'm not going to deduct any points just because you don't have expensive sample libraries but I feel like it's worth mentioning since a lot of the sounds are pretty artificial-sounding, dry, or lacking power, especially the drums, and that unfortunately detracts from the listening experience. You deserve better samples, but yeah, money is a harsh mistress.

I feel like your intro and outro could use some work. My thoughts on the intro are more opinionated. While it isn't a bad intro by any means, you have a very fleshed out piece here, and starting it straight off with a lot of movement doesn't really do the piece justice. If you started with something more low key and subtle and built gradually into the busier sections, I think it would leave more of a suitable effect, especially in such a dynamic piece like this. The ending on the other hand sounded a little unfinished and consequently unsatisfying. I personally would've liked some more closure, rather than a fade-out into a chord that isn't even the tonic.

One other thing I want to critique is your sense of dynamics. Don't get me wrong, there are plenty of moods and dynamics here, which I was very pleased to hear, but some sections fall a little short of what they could be. To me it's almost as if the track is constantly building to a high point which never actually comes. For instance, at 2:09 or 2:36 I was expected a climax to come in, but it never really came. This left the track with a lot of tension/excitement, but never any means to release all of that buildup.

Finally, on a more minor note, 1:21's harp section (and its repetition later on) are a little empty-sounding. You don't need to add more instruments there, but some additional bass accompaniment from the harp would seal the deal. Perhaps even an exaggerated amount of high-end reverb on the sparse drum hits you play in that section would give it a nice sense of depth and space.

Now that all that is mentioned, let me just say that the composition here is simply wonderful. I think your melodies and harmonies are a definite selling point. I can't begin to express how much I enjoyed your energetic arpeggios played by the pizzicato and shamisen, the gorgeous melodies played by the flute and the emotional little harp solos that play during the breakdowns. Care and effort were put into the melodies, and it shows.

A lot of other compositional aspects don't fall behind either. Your transitions are smooth, and your instrument choice is spot on. You went for a definite ethnic/eastern instrumentation with the shamisen, heavy use of flutes and array of different ethnic percussion such as the tam-tam, vibraslap and finger cymbals. What we're left with is a set of instruments where each instrument sounds complementary with the next. Props on having a mostly clear mix too! I agree I would've liked some more bass, as the piece did have that occasional tinny vibe, but I didn't find it much of an issue.

All in all, the critiques I mentioned don't significantly deter from what the focus of this track is - a fleshed-out, lengthy listening experience with fantastic composition and a clear ethnic direction. Good job!

8/10
4/5

Krichotomy responds:

No, this is not a nod to Ōkami, but I certainly don't mind that impression! I love everything about that game.

I look forward to the day that I can play with some of those hefty orchestral VSTs.

I wanted this piece to feel high-energy throughout (hence the chosen intro and outro). It is part of a bigger picture and anything overly low-key would end up as a preceding track rather than part of this track. That is how I presently feel, anyway. Perhaps that is not the best mentality for a stand-alone track.

I had actually initially been working on what I thought would be a more widely-accepted outro, but this one is really the one /I/ wanted for the track. I was already thinking of the criticism I would get for it before I even finished it. ;)

And I particularly like the ending chord I chose. It's common enough for songs to end on a chord other than a tonic to convey a certain feeling, and I actually see ending on the tonic as a lazy default, good in most cases, but not all. If I could show you the images in my mind, I think you would understand my choice of ending chord, but I find it difficult to express those images with words.

The 2:09 "fake climax" is exactly as I wish it to be, but I totally agree that the 2:36 part would do well to actually rise to a climax, especially as a follow-up to the fake climax. I hadn't realized that before.

Regarding emptiness, I feel that everything before 01:39 and some other parts of the track feel rather empty, but I couldn't figure out ways to fill them out without muddying the sound. I think your advice for the harp parts is good.

I'm glad that you enjoy the composition. My favorite aspects are the percussion and the shamisen- they really helped to add character to the piece. (Some of the percussion idea actually came from your piece, "The Festival".) This piece wasn't even meant to sound Eastern until I found that there was a shamisen channel in my soundfont and it didn't sound crappy and synthetic like half the other instruments did. I do have a soft spot for ethnic instrumentation and percussion. :D

Thanks for the lengthy, valuable, and encouraging review!

[Survival of the Hungriest]

This is an NGADM Round 2 Review.

--

After hearing your pieces The SuperBugs Attack, Apocalypse 2012 and now this, I can confirm that you have a certain knack towards making the dangerous, exciting, and edge-of-your-seat type of music. This is truly the most epic and exhilarating piece of music that was submitted to this round, and that's no doubt due to your SUBLIME production value. Really, just like in the previous round, you've crafted a truly spectacular orchestral sound. It's this kind of brilliant execution that gives your tracks an edge, since it ups the professionalism tenfold, and makes the track extremely powerful at high volumes. You are really, really good at what you do.

There are some fantastic compositional touches present in this piece which is a nice change from your previous track which sounded more standard and typical. First off, the atmosphere you created at the start is beyond perfect. It sounds somewhat peaceful but the subtle but tasteful use of dissonant note intervals (whether harmonic or melodic) offer a foreshadowing of the peril up ahead, making for a pretty awesome introduction. Things like the 1:57 piano echoing the melody before it, the various dynamic buildups you've made, the intense tempo change at 3:16 and the unexpected but surprisingly suitable mood change at the end create a wonderful listening experience. 4:25 is such a fantastic little crescendo by the way. I know it's a very specific thing to mention but I just loved it.

My issue the same issue I had with Jay-Turner's Round 1 submission. It feels like each section is purely made with the intention of portraying a mood. I hear a motif you use at both the beginning and the end, which is a nice touch for sure, but everything else feels, purely in terms of composition, like filler. The dangerous parts especially have little melodic meaning to them, choosing instead to play expressionless orchestral hits. During the busier sections, you don't really aim to excite the ears with some compositional complexity and structure, instead choosing to write sections that are there simply to portray an experience. While you do a brilliant job of that, I'll be damned if I don't admit I wasn't disappointed with the melodies!

Having said all that, this is brilliantly-executed stuff. Fantastic work, Peter.

SCORE: 9.4/10

EvilRaccoon responds:

Thanks step. The lack of melody seems to be a common point made, i'll be returning to make sure I do have one next time around. :)

[Memoirs of an Old Dreamer]

This is an NGADM Round 2 Review.

--

I am definitely in two minds about this submission. This has some wonderful qualities, but then there are some issues that take it down. I'm going to start with the good stuff. You develop the theme so much better over here than in your Round 1 track, as you mention in your author's comments. This is precisely the kind of thematic attention I was hoping for in your Round 1 track, and I'm very glad you decided to take the criticism and give it a shot. Your different sections flow smoothly and your various repetitions of the leitmotif tie it all together. The motif itself is a real pleasure to listen to and easily remains in the listener's head, and the transitions you wrote to lead up to it or come out of it are well-written!

All of your composition, in fact, shines. There are some beautiful harmonies, memorable sections and overall a strong sense of musicality that's present here. The 2:19 chromatic passages were quite a surprise but after a few listens they grew on me and I commend you for that bold idea! The instrumentation and voicing are, in my opinion, where the submission begins to fall short. I mean, some of your instruments do work well, whereas others, like the piano, seem to stand out like a sore thumb at times. What really peeves me, however, is your voicing among the various instruments. Various instruments just play together in unison, and there's a lack of supporting elements and intricate details behind your melodies that excite the listener's ears.

For instance, at 2:19 you start adding some proper voicing, call-and-response, counterpoint, etc, but it's short-lived, because soon after the melody starts playing again and it even starts fading out, which is another point by the way. Man, what a bad way to end the track (in my opinion, of course!). It doesn't even fit with what the (well-written, might I add) story you wrote in the description - the man dies - shouldn't you give this a suitable ending? Or, if you want to fade out to portray a feeling of continuation, then at least put a bit more effort into it rather than grabbing the melody and doing a master volume fade-out on it. The execution isn't quite as impressive as it was in your previous track either. The mix is muddy and the instruments sound a bit more lifeless and bland.

So yes, I'm a little torn with this submission. It performs well in areas that your Round 1 submission fails in, but conversely you executed some aspects better in that track than you did in this one. Either way, thanks for the pleasant listen and heartwarming story!

SCORE: 8.2/10

Jay-Turner responds:

Thank you for your review Step.

I'm glad that you like the overall piece. I agree that there are a lot of things that detract from it and it could be a lot better.

I've definitely learnt a lot about my own abilities from this piece. I'm dissatisfied with it in all of the areas that you mention so it is no surprise. For the voicing of instruments I reaaaally struggled as my woodwind and brass are all pretty naff. But, I had the idea that I wanted a really woodwind oriented piece, so I tried with what I had, albeit not the best decision I ever made. One thing I really feels horrible about the piece is that I tried to 'reverb' all my woodwind to beef-it up, which resulted in it having a very horrible strange sound.

The ending was definitely a bad call, I agree. I think I was running out of time so I did a rush job on the ending, and I was already generally fed up with it. My mix too, was terrible, I think thats one of things I need work on.

Thanks for the review again. It was definitely a learning curve.